Welcome to the Sandwich Generation: Tips to Get You Started
You have heard of the Baby Boomers and Generation Y, but have you heard about the Sandwich Generation? Pew Research reports that the Sandwich Generation is an increasingly growing portion of the population who are either emotionally and/or financially responsible for both an aging parent and their own children. This increase is due to the fact that people are living longer, and young adults are having a harder time getting jobs.
If you have a parent who requires your care, but you also still provide for your children, even if they are over 18, then welcome to the Sandwich Generation. Caring for your own kids can be challenging enough, but adding in an aging parent and you are sure to be stressed out. How can you balance it all?
Get Educated
The US Department of State suggests that the first thing you need to do is educate yourself on the situation. This includes learning about your parent’s health situation so that you know how to take action should your help be needed. You should also take the time to learn about the legal and financial options for both you and your parent. For example, you may be able to claim your parent as a dependent on your taxes if you are supporting him or her financially. You should also look into getting a Power of Attorney so you can help your parent legally if needed.
Be Honest
One of the hardest parts of being in the Sandwich Generation is the realization that you simply can’t care for both your children and your parent full-time. Communicating this with your parent is even harder. However, the Mayo Clinic believes that being honest and open with your parent is a key part of making the situation work. You need to make your boundaries known from the get go. Offer your parent other alternatives for the times that you are unable to provide the care he/she deserves. For example, you can suggest a temporary nursing facility for care after a surgery or hospital stay. There are plenty of facilities, like an Emeritus skilled nursing facility, that can provide the hands-on attention that your parent needs for this specialized situation. They will be able to give your parent the 24-hour care that you simply cannot. Once your parent’s recovery is complete, you can go back to providing the part-time care you are capable of.
Take a Backseat
Remember, even though caring for your parent is hard on you, it is probably even more challenging for them to surrender control. Respect this, and try to allow your parent to be in charge of situations whenever possible. When feasible, let your parent decide where to live, whether or not to drive, and when they receive hired help. As long as you know your parent is safe, try to respect his or her wishes.
Take Baby Steps
If you and your parent do decide that a big change is imminent, try to take things slowly so that all of the adjusting is easier. If you both decide that a full-time nursing care facility is the best course of action, have your parent go for a day or two at a time. If the best route is to have your parent move in with you, allow him/her to stay the night a few times to make sure it’s really the best situation for all parties involved.
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Category: Family Finances
